News & Stories
Inspirational Stories

Connecticut Public Schools Use the Good Grief Club as a Model
by Joan Miller

When Joan Heller Miller and Ellen Sirkis began their volunteer work with Hospice Caring, Inc. several years ago as Good Grief children's bereavement group facilitators, they never suspected their work would extend beyond Montgomery County, Maryland.

Joan Miller moved with her family to Connecticut two years ago, and recognized the need to provide bereavement groups in all grade levels in Connecticut schools. She knew instantly to contact Ellen for help because of her expertise with older teens. Ellen rose to the occasion "above and beyond" the call of duty. With typical "Ellen enthusiasm", she traveled to Connecticut and took over the responsibility of delivering a developmentally appropriate high school program based on the Good Grief program to complement the program for younger children that Joan had prepared.

On November 17, 2005, Ellen and Joan trained school social workers and psychologists from twenty-five public elementary, middle, and high schools in Hartford. They brought training materials and focused on how to establish and facilitate a structured program in their respective schools. Joan created a modified version of the Good Grief teaching manual, and purchased materials for groups to begin at each school including a plethora of craft materials, cuddly teddy bears, and individual wooden memory boxes for students to decorate, and which would hold written or illustrated sentiments, photos, or other trinkets as memories of their loved ones.

Winston B. Johnson, ACSW, LCSW, Director of Social Work and Psychological Services in the Hartford, Connecticut Public Schools, was a tremendous advocate. He arranged the in-service training and encouraged his professional staff to attend.

When Joan was facing her own death from acute myelogenous leukemia six years ago, "there was no opportunity for my own three children to express their difficult feelings and process their grief." She was determined to transform her experience into a positive one for grieving children, and with the help of Hospice Caring, Ellen Sirkis, Winston Johnson, and his staff, she has been able to make this dream a reality.

Joan Miller is a former Hospice Caring volunteer who now resides in Connecticut.

Hospice Caring and the Community Can Make a Difference


She called the Hospice Caring office in tears. Her doctor said three to six months.
 
This was the beginning of an almost year-long relationship with Diane (not her real name), a young mother of two; wife to a husband who had just recently found work again after having lost his job six months earlier in one of those all too common layoff situations.
 
Diane wanted to continue curative care in the hope that something would stop the breast cancer or at the very least give her more time with her children. Would Hospice Caring help? Diane had called the right place.

Hospice Caring, Inc. is a non-medical, all volunteer hospice, licensed by the State of Maryland. We provide specially trained volunteers to provide respite care, emotional and practical support to seriously ill patients, many just like Diane who want to continue curative care. Hospice Caring’s services are free of charge.

We went into action. Because Diane’s children were young, she was concerned about their time at home after school and before her husband got home from his downtown location. Hospice Caring provided volunteers after school to help with homework and setting the table for the family’s nightly dinner together. Since Diane could no longer drive herself to appointments, Hospice Caring provided transportation assistance, too. We enlisted the aid of the many friends and family who wanted to help but just didn’t know what to do.

Within a week or two, the loving support of friends, family, and Hospice Caring had settled into a smooth routine working to ensure that Diane had just as much support as she and her family needed. Diane felt comfortable because she didn’t have to ask for “favors” every day; family and friends were relieved to be able to be of service; and Hospice Caring….it’s what we do every day. It’s what keeps our volunteers going; there is no more life-affirming work than this.

A program we were able to put into place came from one of our partner organizations, Food and Friends, a Washington, DC organization that provides free meals and/or groceries to patients with AIDS or other life-challenging illnesses. Food and Friends provided three meals a day to this family of four, delivered daily by their volunteers, and which were free of charge. The delicious meals, prepared from fresh ingredients, zing with good nutrition.

These were the meals that graced the family table that Hospice Caring volunteers helped the children set at night. It truly does take a community. When Diane died, Food and Friends volunteers brought a sympathy basket to the family and continued providing meals for two weeks.

Hospice Caring provided bereavement support for all members of the family, through peer support groups for Diane’s husband and the Good Grief Club and Camp Caring for Diane’s two children. The children’s volunteers continued to stay in touch with decreasing frequency so their leaving would not create another precipitous loss for this already grieving family.

Hospice Caring, Inc. and the community - together we can make a difference.


Lynn Schneider is Principal of My HR Department, LLC and a Hospice Caring volunteer.